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Friday, April 01, 2011

Bally's, D.O.E. and GM Collaborate

Breaking news! Exclusive to Autopophet:

Bally's, the U.S. Department of Energy, and GM are announcing today that they are forming a collaborative joint venture called "Sweat-n-Volt(tm)".

Sweat-n-Volt will be installed in several Bally's Fitness locations to show the feasibility of recovering exercise energy as usable transportation fuel. Treadmills, stair-steppers, and stationary bicycles will be modified to generate 12v DC current using left over alternators donated by GM. The 12v feeds will be joined at a 12 to 240v transformer, which will then feed a free plug-in hybrid charging station in the parking lot.

"We're very excited to harness the exercise energy of Americans to provide transportation fuel", said Joe White, the D.O.E. project manager. "We expect California to be especially productive. The mid-west not as much, although we anticipate more miles generated after the 1st of the year."

GM's spokesman, Bob Lawrence, "This is a historic opportunity to combine America's health kick with American's transportation needs. We're also looking at the feasibility of marketing a portable version, so people can pedal their way to a fully charged Volt, and a thinner waistline, in the comfort of their own home"

Bally's Tammy Silverstein said "We were already looking at doing this to help lower our electricity bill. Now, we can help our patrons get home from the gym, too."

(April Fools!)

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